i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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