I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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