man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
