glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Randomize
