we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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