how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
