I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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