he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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