dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
