I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
