the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
