they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
