Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
The beer is more important than you right now.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
