my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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