she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Randomize
