his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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