I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
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