Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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