The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Randomize
