My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
