Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.

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(720): View more from Colorado

the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.

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(440): View more from Ohio

By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.

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Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
Read it at the TFLN blog
(631): View more from New York

the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care

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(949): View more from California

I have no words

(951): View more from California

Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.

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(214): View more from Texas

My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....

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