It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
splinters make it hard to masturbate
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
19 Movie Extras Reveal What It’s Like To Work With Celebrities
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump