You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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