the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
