brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
with your own penis?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
