Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
