its not stalking. its research.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
