Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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