If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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