People with herpes should wear stickers.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Randomize
