did you get engaged???
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Randomize