Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You ate ashes out of my bong
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
