Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
It was confusing and full of hummus
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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