to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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