It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I can't turn off my feet"
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
