I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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