My hand turned me down
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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