Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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