Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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