The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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