Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Randomize
