if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
