I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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