come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
