My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Randomize
