im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
