You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
