Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
