You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize