Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize