I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
