So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
