god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
